40- Leery of Reading the Word
February 8, 1979
Problem: Fear about reading the Word, in studying, and in doing devotions—that I will be led astray. Lack of full trust and dependence on the Holy Spirit—my heart says: remember what happened before and how far you got into a lie (when I believed as a new Christian that God was telling me that I was going to marry a particular person and I was derailed….)
Realization: I did not have awareness then in my first few months of being a new believer of my deceitful heart. I was immature. I did not know the difference between my voice building me up and the spirit of the evil one (I will be God, I will be lifted up) and the spirit of submission to the almighty Lord, the spirit of humility.
Application: Joshua 6:1-20 God gave a promise. God gave instructions. God expected obedience and God would give victory. OBEDIENCE isn’t an OPTION. Trust and obey. For me: the promise of a child who is a reward [The fruit of the womb is His reward. Ps 127:3] –and is who is blessed. Walk by faith. Trust Him. Obey Him. ‘Don’t shout’ means to me: don’t complain, murmur, worry aloud, doubt aloud. Take your woes to Daddy and your heart should be abundant with faith in Him.