42- Home Again,
Dan was very worried about me, and we were both concerned about our baby, due in six weeks. I was exhausted and half sick, as you can see in the picture, as I laid my body down in the airport during our layover at JFK after our flight from Zurich. On to Los Angeles, and a happy reunion with my parents and my sisters.
My parents were so relieved that we were finally back on US soil. I’m sure my mom fixed my favorite foods, and everyone joined us in being concerned about my barely protruding belly and minuscule weight gain (14 pounds at this point, if I remember correctly). After a several days of family love, excellent food–and my mom’s prodding to eat hearty, and resting up, we returned to Reno, staying with Dan’s Gramma Fern for several days until we found a home.
April 4, 1979 Fears today. Little faith. I read Psalm 31, and then I faced my problem: feeling inadequacy as a parent, fear that I cannot give the love that our baby will need. We learned in our pre-natal class last night about some birth defects and genetic problems. My conclusion—we are all defective in our genetic makeup because of Adam’s sin. Everyone who ever existed is defective. Everyone, but our Lord Jesus. And someday we will all be like Him. In the meantime HE IS THE LOVE we need to accept each other as we are. He is the love I need to accept myself as I am. He is the love I need to accept baby Lemaire, just exactly as God has created him/her. If there are physical or mental deficiencies, we will be okay. By faith I married an imperfect man, (and look what love has blossomed)—and he married me! What faith. And by faith we conceived a child that we really wanted and assuredly the Lord will provide the bonds of love that will be a blessing to the three of us.
Timothy Micah Lemaire was born April 28, 1979, weighing in at 7 pounds 14 ounces! I had prayed that he would not be premature so that when people counted the months they would know he was a nine-month baby and that we had not fooled around before we got married. It was really important to me, because of my history of promiscuity. Thank You, Jesus! We had to leave Timmy in the hospital NICU (on IV antibiotics) for three days for jaundice and a suspected infection. That was SO hard. The three of us were soon reunited and snug in our little brick house on Cheney Street. Our mothers, who came to be called GG and Bebo, each came for a visit in those first few weeks, and Dan’s other grandmother, Mumbo, gave us a baby shower inviting Dan’s college friends. Dottie’s shower included friends from church and JoAnn’s shower included my teaching friends. It was humbling to receive SO MUCH! Dan bought us a small apartment-sized washing machine, and I washed the cloth diapers and hung them and everything else on the clothesline in the back yard.