72- Looking Back to the 80’s from 2017 Vantage Point

As I (now age 72) am reading my journals for this blog, looking WAY back to another time, they were full of my crying out to the Lord. I was trading my brokenness for His strength. I was overwhelmed in my circumstances and knew that I needed the life of Jesus which was inside me to pour forth out of me in order to cope with the day-to-day, to make sense of everything, to keep me afloat.

I felt earnestly my responsibility of raising our boys carefully so that they would grow up to love the Lord, be strong in their walks with Him, and be prepared for the mission field, should God resume and confirm our call.

I also wanted to please God and please my husband. I had married a man who was a real man: smart, responsible, hard working, mature. He had failed in his first marriage, as had I, and we were both committed to our success as a team. He read and studied his Bible, and lived for God and family. He also adopted the ‘going to church’ mentality, which meant we all went to church together. There were lots of meetings in all the churches in the 1980’s.

Everyone we knew in Life Center Church was there every time the doors were opened, a minimum of Sunday morning, Sunday evening, and also for the Wednesday night home groups. That’s where we worshiped the Lord, that’s where our friendships were. As the boys grew up, their friends were our friends’ kids, friendships that lasted through their teen years, into adulthood, and continuing to this day. Our sons are turning 38, 37, 35, 33 this year. Even though people have moved, they keep in touch through Facebook, etc.

The following are verses that motivated me in my early walk in pursuing Jesus every day and still motivate me today. The thing is, my journals are still full of me pouring my heart out to Him.

You will seek Me and find Me when you search for me with all your heart.

I sought the Lord and He heard me and delivered me from all my fears.

But as for me, I TRUST in You, O Lord; I say, “You are my God.” My times are in Your hand.

But he who TRUSTS in the Lord, mercy shall surround him.

You are my hiding place; You shall preserve me from trouble; You shall surround me with songs of deliverance.

Behold the eye of the Lord is on those who fear Him, on those who hope in His mercy.

Jeremiah 29:13; Psalm 34:4; Psalm 31:14-15a; Psalm 32:10; Psalm 32:7;Psalm 33:18.

My message is: be glad if you are weak, insecure, not confident—that means that more than other people you will go to Jesus continuously for His strength, for His security, and for His confidence. And for your daily life you will need His perspective and His ability to persevere in you through your trials. Because you are aware of what you are not–You will be diligently seeking Him and leaning on Him, and you will receive much favor.

Psalm 147:11 The Lord delights in those who fear Him, who put their hope in His unfailing love. NIV

Psalm 149:4 For the Lord takes delight in his people; He crowns the humble with victory. NIV

Be glad if you feel that you are untalented, because in time He will unearth gold in you and use you!

Don’t wallow in what you are not. Jesus has everything we need and is the most generous Person I know. He loves to share His life. As He writes blogs and books through me, He gets the credit because I am dialoguing with Him through every paragraph! People will say: “SHE can write?? I never knew it was in her.”

As He sings through you, people will say: “I’ve sat near her in church and she really worships and loves the Lord,” and He gets the credit.

As you become strong in everyone’s sight because you are relying on Jesus for everything, those who know the real you (the insecure you who feels ineffectual and inferior) will be amazed at how the Lord shines through you.