169- Needs Met!

169- Needs Met!

November 29, 1985

Jesus is MY PERSONAL Savior as well as the PERSONAL Savior of each one in the world.

Therefore I have the RIGHT to come before His throne

-with praises and thanksgiving and sonship

-boldly with confidence

I rebuke any unbelief in my heart, in Jesus’ name.

I have asked You for $126 for the beginning-to-read ACA program. It has not come.

Believing Your provision comes with Your will, I ask for $100 for some books I would like to order for Timmy from Hewitt-Moore.

This way we could cover more subject areas—science, social studies, reading, math, art, phonics.

ANSWERED PRAYER!

December 5, 1985

We went to Carol’s to visit, fellowship in the Lord, discuss home school. She had been thinking urgently about Timmy’s schooling, she said “last week”.

While she was talking to me about it an idea come to her to GIVE me the 6 or 7 sets of reading books she had just received!

Also she gave me a social studies syllabus called My America which will cover Social studies wonderfully for all the boys. WHERE GOD LEADS, GOD PROVIDES.

YOU amaze me, Lord. You put the need on both our hearts, then allowed Carol to be a blessing and for us to be blessed! Bless You, praise You. Wonderful Savior.

163- God is Greater Than Me

163-God is Greater Than Me

November 8, 1985

The house began to be messy yesterday and continued today, seeming hopeless.

I started fretting, then looked up and read Timmy’s Sunday School mobile which hangs over my head in the schoolroom.

How to be Happy: Noah obeyed God

                                        Noah trusted God

                                        Noah thanked God

 

So listen, obey, then flow, trust, believe, praise—and leave the results to God.

Interesting, it says nothing about keeping clutter in your house organized and that will bring happiness.

From the boys’ book: The Braggy King of Babylon, about King Nebuchadnezzar:

“You must learn that your God is much greater than you.” (You will be like a beast till the day that you do.)

I felt convicted of not putting God up high enough. Sometimes I feel like a beast! He must be the one I worship and give my attention to.

November 9

I prayed on the phone with my friend Joyce and she had some words of encouragement for me –

*that I needed to be open to hear afresh from the Lord

*that I need to pray about breaking my own strongholds in my mind

*that there will be newness and freshness and variety coming (not monotony)

*she exhorted me to put on the helmet of salvation, to protect my mind

*she asked if I prayed in the Spirit during the day

This goes along with keeping my eyes on Jesus and exalting Him always. These are some specific things that I can do.

161- Notice me!

161- Notice me!

November 3, 1985

Dan went to church taking Stevie and Mark.

I stayed home with Timmy and Daniel who had runny noses and sore throats.

I began to resent Dan being so well respected, enjoying another ‘feeding’ of the Word of God when for weeks I have been in the church nursery or been home with sick kids.

I’ve also been thinking about people who are oozing love and joy when their personal circumstances stink or their health is broken, or their hearts are broken.

Why not me oozing love and joy?

God spoke to me clearly—you still want glory for yourself. You’re jealous of your husband’s time away, his position of honor within the church. You don’t want to stand beside or behind him—you want to be in front. Also with ME (not verbatim remembering): You still want glory for yourself or at least lots of attention regarding your ‘difficult’ circumstances. You want everyone to know you are sacrificing. The flesh is alive and well, Georgann.

I repented and I was IMMEDIATELY release of bitterness and heaviness.  wow

YET, later with JoAnn, I made sure she knew something of my sacrifices! Groan!! 

Lord, I prayed later, release me to be a child whose life exemplifies Christ’s acceptance of Your will and His trust in Your leading.

153- Praying Loud and Long!

153- Praying Loud and Long!

July 8, 1985

Pastor Dave gave a great message yesterday on Preparing for Entering into our Promised Land:

         ~keep defining your purpose,

         ~keep it fresh,

         ~keep facing it in faith.

Today my purpose was to get Mark and Daniel their much overdue shots.

Everyone slept till 8 except Steve. He woke up early and had a 30 minute crying spell! I wavered–should I still try to go?

NO–I will not waver! My purpose was so firm, I was determined. 

EVERYTHING WORKED OUT BEAUTIFULLY. We found out once we got there that Steve needed a shot and a polio booster, too. Didn’t tell him. He was first and didn’t even flinch!

Steve and Mark stayed with Dan at the property. Did wonderfully!

Tim and Daniel went with me to SaknSave—did wonderfully!

Miraculous—everyone’s attitude was great!

What Steve’s mysterious fussing pushed me to was long and desperate prayer. Plus I prayed aloud all the way to the Health Dept and then all the way to the store.

Last night we met Dan at the property. We were late, rushed. I prayed loud, long, desperately. It went SO WELL. I even took 9 of the kids on a hike (that’s NOT me!) and organized them for frisbee and catch. JOYFULLY!

Later: I had read an article discussing following God with your whole heart. Which included:

Jeremiah 29:13 And you will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart.

So I prayed with my whole heart.

Also I’ve been thinking about: If you want to be great in God’s kingdom, learn to be the servant of all.

I prayed accordingly and got my opportunity tonight night with all 4 boys fussing at one point! Dan was at church at the elders’ meeting. He and I got to bed at 11:30, then Dan was up 1:30 and then at 3:00 with boys. I took over till 4:30. We all slept till 6:30 then I walked ½ hour.

Rather than getting mad, rather than trying to sneak away if they seemed settled, only to have to get up again, I prayed for Jesus’ servant heart. I became content, kind, ministered, prayed. I woke up relatively rested and in a good mood! Miracle.

148- He is My Refuge

148- He is My Refuge

June 7, 1985

We’ve been going to the library and getting lots of picture books each week, like 30-40! Today I had asked God to remind me to get Better Late Than Early about home schooling if it was important for me to read it. He did.

It was not in the card catalog. I went to the stacks anyway to see if it was there. All I could think of was Morris, Robert Morris. I asked God to guide me to the author and HE DID! Even though the author was actually Raymond Moore! And even though the book I was looking for was not there BUT School Can Wait was there. God, it is so special to walk with You.

My day began nervously—over-tired from being up at least 15 times last night. Mark had a fever, Daniel is teething, Dan was sleeping heavily from yesterday’s vasectomy. I stopped to play a tape and praise You and my perspective came. Praise God.

It is so good to praise the Lord!

Tim and Steve helped me weed, Daniel was happy in the walker, Mark rested on the couch.

Psalm 62, Living Bible

I stand silently before the Lord, waiting for him to rescue me. For salvation comes from Him alone. Yes, He alone is my Rock, my rescuer, defense and fortress. Why then should I be tense with fear when troubles come?…My protection and success come from God alone. He is my refuge, a Rock where no enemy can reach me. O my people, trust him all the time. Pour out your longings before Him for He can help! verses 1,2,7,8. My Refuge, I love you!

145- Pray in the Spirit and Read the Bible

145- Pray in the Spirit

and Read the Bible

February, 1985

Dan and I were always reading Christian books, listening to speakers on KNIS, and listening to tapes by famous Christians. We were also having our own personal Bible time and attending church three times a week. We never relied on Sunday messages to feed us. We have always felt it was our responsibility to press in to get more of God.

In the park one day I met Kelly, who also had four little kids. She was listening to Gloria Copeland’s tape series, Walk in the Spirit, and shared them with me. This prophetic word of Kennet E. Hagin’s was on the tape, and I wrote it in my journal.

Those who walk with God, for God is a spirit, will walk in the realm of the Spirit, will commune and SEE and minister in the realm of the Spirit. It is not easy. The flesh will hold you back. The Word teaches you to crucify the flesh. Man will hold you back. Man will hold you into the things SEEN with the physical senses. Move into the realm of the Spirit. The things you have longed for will happen. Spiritual manifestation will be natural. Let your Spirit have the privilege of communication with God. Give your spirit opportunity in the Word—just an hour or two out of 24. Your life will be empowered and you will be a mighty force for God. Others will see the power and love of God flowing out of you. You will have cause for rejoicing. An hour or two a day will bring insight and your prayers will have clout. You will move in the Spirit. Other things will fall off of you. Let the Spirit pray what’s in your heart to the outside.

This was just what I needed to hear to boost me into a closer walk with Jesus. It provided motivation to read my Bible MORE and pray in tongues MORE and to take responsibility for my growth in my relationship with Jesus. 

134- Back in Step, but Wrestling with Moods

134- Back in Step,

but Wrestling with Moods

December 18, 1984, continued

I was back into my almost-daily time with the Lord, pouring out my heart, talking to Him about everything, and going to the Bible for relevant verses to encourage myself in the truth.

Lord, looking back over the last two weeks:

DISTRESSED: feeling generally nervous and irritable–partly because Mark and the baby had bad colds and that kept us home bound for a solid week (and friends away!); I broke my tooth on a corn nut; I had canker sores plus an added virus on my tongue and in my throat; grieving over an angry outburst; Christmas pressures, including comparing ours with our friends’ plans; back to worrying about birth control.

BLESSED: because I received compassion and prayer from my support group: Jackie, Susie, Jan. And super blessed because Dan has been totally non-condemning, accepting, loving, kind, understanding of my moodiness.

ENCOURAGED: that at the men’s prayer breakfast that Dan goes to at church every Wednesday morning there was a word from the Lord for the married men from the single guy about loving their wives.

Dan and I are becoming more real-life humans. I’ve backed off from complaining about him being gone so much, realizing we need money to live! The job he has at the church as foreman of the building project requires extremely long hours (50-70 hours a week).

 

REALIZATIONS:

*God will comfort, I need to come to Him.

*Got is cleansing me, refining me.

*There is HOPE in Christ ALWAYS.

*I am really loved– by God, my husband, and my friends.

Ephesians 5:1 Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children, and walk in love, just as Christ also loved you and gave Himself up for us…

        8 for you were formerly darkness, but now you are Light in the Lord; walk as children of the light…trying to learn what is pleasing to the Lord.

        15 be careful how you walk, not as unwise but as wise,

        18 be filled with the Spirit,

        19 singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord;

        20 always giving thanks for all things…

        22 wives be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord

Father, I see impurity in me from a greedy, competitive, covetous heart. CLEANSE ME. I accept Christ’s work on the cross. The better alternative is imitating God, being a reflection of Him.

Thank You that I can come to the Word and receive the truth from Your perspective–wiser than the world, full of power and direction.

125- Following God’s Trail – #7

125- Following God’s Trail – #7

May 6 –at church, Sandy M prayed: “The Lord has touched your babies. He assured me that He will be there to supervise the delivery. He told me to tell you.”

May 8 –open house, a few came. I will not be discouraged because God is merciful and He is perfect in His timing. He has purposes to fulfill. I purpose to trust Him.

May 12 –car fire! Our Nova station wagon caught on fire in the grocery store parking lot. Very strange. No one was hurt.

May 20 –open house, two couples, both interested.

May 23 –to Lynn’s for Lamaze breathing practice.

May 25 –very tense day: Elim guy never called. I was under pressure to get this house ready for possible realtors’ visits before the boys and I left for Michele’s Bible study for the morning. Feeling overwhelmed. Karen called—the Lord told her it was urgent that she call me. Praise God. She prayed, I cried, and the tension broke and my perspective changed. Then after dinner, much baby activity. Continuous Braxton Hicks for 1 hour. Wore me out!

May 28 –recognized fear, uncertainty, lack of faith about baby’s birth. Cried out to the Lord. My resources won’t be sufficient—no confidence in the doctor, etc. I thought hard about God, but couldn’t really get ahold of Him. I thought—how can I have success? Joshua 1:8 came to mind. Decided to use my NAS Bible with the topical index. I had just bought a spiral notebook. Looking up verses on the favor of God and the faithfulness of God. Will meditate daily on them. Dan wants to read them with me. Together we will see our Lord work.

May 29 –I got up early for devotions and prayer. Meditated on my scriptures in my spiral notebook. My faith was built. Elim guy called and we have a house for $300 a month beginning in August in NY.

May 30 –A realtor, called saying the artist couple, the Clarke’s, are very interested in buying our house.

May 31 –Dan set himself to pray. He said: “God what if they offer us $92,000?” THEY DID! He felt God said, “Just sell.”

Signed the agreement to sell. They will call us back tomorrow if they agree with our date changes.

The car fire had sidelined our car. We went to a lot and bought a car. We were all out till 11:30pm.

We felt God’s grace and blessing. Dodge Colt Vista. Seven passenger. But it doesn’t FEEL like seven passenger and there is so little trunk area. Trying not to argue.

117- Dan Loves Me and Jesus Loves Me

117- Dan Loves Me, and Jesus Loves Me

December 1, 1983

Dan loves me. I believe him.

December 8

The Homemaking Bible Study today ended up being a very painful experience. Dan prayed for me. Perhaps the Lord will give me feedback. I praise God for His continual unfailing love.

December 9

I need a revelation about my personality. There is something I think God is trying to get across. Dan says I am alright.

December 10

Today I am trying to justify being snarky, moody, and sour. The scripture gives me no support whatsoever.

Psalm 34:13 Keep your tongue from evil

                   14 Seek peace and pursue it

Proverbs 12:15 There is one who speaks like the piercings of a sword, but the tongue of the wise promotes health.

December 18

Dan confessed our relationship is not what it should be. That he has been working hard at other things and has been taking me for granted. Praise the Lord.

January 19, 1984

3am A dream woke me up. It was about a former relationship and was upsetting. I got up to tend the fire and make sure the boys were covered and I felt I should stay up and settle some things with God.

When I said to God: “Dan is just a man. How long can he love me?”

God said: “As long as I can love you!”

Dan belongs to God, the relationship is divinely ordained and divinely sustained. (We have always known that God brought us together.) I got assurance that I need have NO FEAR of God’s or Dan’s love running out the more they get to know me. We both will keep putting wrongs at the foot of the cross. Jesus will give us ongoing love for Himself and one another.

116- God’s Revealed Will For Us

116- God’s Revealed Will

For Us

November 22, 1983

Dan has been heavy and burdened. Today I felt such compassion for the frustrations he was feeling and I asked God to please speak to Dan about His will for us. That evening my best friend’s husband, Paul, came over to get some teaching tapes from us, totally out-of-the-blue, spontaneous, and unusual.

He knew we were reviving our interest in Dan getting more training so that we could get to Japan and fulfill our calling.

He had come primarily because he felt he had a word from the Lord for us:

“there is a family and a house waiting to receive you or in the process of being prepared for you. They will appreciate your strong commitment to the Lord and His work. Love is waiting for your family. The Lord is saying: go north, far north, and do not put off applying the school there. People there are professional, stable, mature.”

Dan took this word to heart and set to work on his application to Elim Bible Institute in upstate New York. We sent it off a few weeks later. He also applied himself to completing the finishing touches to our solar house so we could put it on the market.

Besides our pastor’s sermons and the books we were reading, many visiting speakers to our church fueled our enthusiasm in trusting in Jesus and living our lives full of faith in Him.

Anthony Campolo spoke at our church and we also listened to his messages on the Christian radio station, KNIS. Campolo said:

*it’s okay to be poor if it’s because you’ve given everything away to help others.

*we need to cry over the things God cries over.

*be yielded and surrendered so Jesus can use you.

*Jesus didn’t preach prosperity.

Paul arriving with a word for us on the day I had prayed was remarkable. We had been waiting and praying for a breakthrough and this was it.