260 – I Usurped My Husband’s Authority

260 – I Usurped My Husband’s Authority

February 25, 1987

Dan said something yesterday morning as a correction to me, which was very unusual. I responded with deep hurt and CRYING! I often cry at patriotic events or heartwarming things, or from the Spirit’s moving, but this crying was from PAIN and hurt feelings.

Later I felt that Dan’s words were not the real pain, because I had to acknowledge that I had been bad mannered. But the conviction of the Spirit was DEEP. I had offended the Lord!

I had usurped Dan’s authority, which put things out of order. And I had insulted him.

An instance at chapel this week brought me clarity.

The worship leader interrupted the lady who was giving the messages and the prayer requests. It was horrid.

The Spirit of God was immediately and thoroughly quenched and everyone felt it. I’ve never seen anything like it.

Then the worship leader’s instruction to the body was sort of dumb.

If what he could not wait to share had been something good, the Holy Spirit could not honor it because the man was so out of line.

Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband. Ephesians 5:33

I had stepped out of respect for my husband. 

I apologized, he apologized, and we kissed and made up. We will both be more careful.

Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another so that you may be healed. The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much. James 5:16

259 – Hattie’s Story Encouraged Our Faith

259 – Hattie’s Story Encouraged Our Faith

February 19, 1987 very late

Sister Ruth Rodriguez, my instructor at Elim, came for dinner. She is bright with the Light of the Spirit, gracious, interested, and interesting!

God spoke clearly that:

-He directs our steps

-He will provide

In other words, He will guide and He will provide!

Sister Ruth shared the story of Sister Hattie Hammond. I think it took place in the 1930’s.

The Lord told Hattie to go to a city and start a church. “Me, Lord? –a woman?”

She went, took a boarding house room, shut herself in to pray.

One day the Lord said, “Let’s take a walk.”

On a street corner at a red light she mentioned to the man standing next to her that it was a beautiful day that Jesus had given.

He rolled his eyes and groaned: “One of those.”

She went on talking.

He invited her to his home to meet his wife and have dinner.

He called in all the neighbors.

This group was the nucleus of the church!

They rented a room for a church service for $1 a week.

In the first service, the Lord said, “I want one person baptized in the Holy Spirit.”

Hattie said: “ Oh, no, Lord.” But she spoke it out to the group.

A lady walked forward covered in furs and pearls. It was THE Mrs. Dupont! She was filled with the Spirit!

The moral of the story was: TRUST IN THE LORD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, DO NOT LEAN ON YOUR OWN UNDERSTANDING; ACKNOWLEDGE HIM IN ALL YOUR WAYS, AND HE WILL MAKE YOUR PATH STRAIGHT. Proverbs 3:5-6

Dan and Georgann and boys obeyed the word of the Lord, received much in blessing. They were a testimony to many, and many were saved….Amen!

258 – Listening for God’s Direction

258 – Listening for God’s Direction

February 17 and 18, 1987

Dan said yesterday he wanted to call Pastor Dave to see if maybe he had a prophetic word for us that would give us some guidance. Should we continue here on this course or return home to Reno…

Today Pastor Dave called us!

Dan did not share specifics with Dave because we want to hear from the Lord, not get man’s advice. Nothing definitive transpired. He asked what he could do for us, Dan said pray. 

When my mom asked yesterday how the money situation was, I said fine.

We’re depending on God, not man. He will come through with job and provision and clear direction.

In the news from home, Pastor Dave, a former policeman, said that the youth activities area in the juvenile department of the jail is open to and welcoming the Christian message! They have so many youth on drugs they know they need outside help with the kids.

Friends of ours are selling their house and business and going into full-time ministry in a nearby town. I am stirred! Happy for them. Things are happening in Reno.

But living in Livonia has been such a refuge for me. A healing place. It’s not easy to think of letting go of it.

And the Lord opened her (Lydia’s) heart to respond to the things spoken by Paul. Acts 16:14

Open my heart to the things of the Spirit as I read Your word today!

Now while Paul was waiting for them at Athens, his spirit was being provoked within him as he was beholding the city full of idols. Acts 17:16

Paul was provoked by the many idols in the city and my spirit was greatly provoked as I watched the Transcendental Meditation video in the Cults class. I finally had to leave.

It’s still amazing to me how when I read in the Bible it relates to my life so perfectly.

257 – More Time with My Boys

257 – More Time

with My Boys

February 4, 1987

I woke up at 2:30am concerned about Stevie, feeling I’m so busy I don’t just sit and listen and play with him and his brothers. I had a few ideas on how to help each of them: an old idea that each boy could get a turn to go alone with Dan , then with me the next time, to the diner down the street, for a milkshake or something. Walk, hold hands, chat.

also: I could ask Carleen if I could bring one boy at a time to spend the morning with her boys while I am at class at Elim.

also: skip a homeschool subject once in a while to play a game with one boy.

May God help me. Why do I know He will? He always does.

Commit your way to the Lord, trust also in Him, and He shall bring it to pass. Psalm 37:5

The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord, and He delights in his way. Psalm 37:23

256 – Stay or Go Home

256 – Stay or Go Home

February 1, 1987 5am

Dan woke up with a vision of a jar with a vacuum in it—sucking his hands, rendering him helpless. It related to his friend in the mental institution. It struck fear into Dan’s heart. He felt it was definitely a warning to get out of this relationship. We obviously cannot help this friend.

I believe that Dan has been trying to save someone who does not want to be saved. And that this has put us in a place of impotency. It has clouded his present judgment. 

Such a tragic situation for this couple and for the rest of us. But our God restores.

Dan has been talking of leaving Elim in the middle of this semester. He had thought of not signing up for any classes at all so we could leave easily. As he shared this I felt peace though I was a little dismayed at moving on so soon from this wonderful place.

Show us the way, Lord.

Psalm 34:1 I will bless the Lord at all times; His praise shall continually be in my mouth.

7 The angel of the Lord encamps all around those who fear Him, and delivers them.

O LORD, lead me in Your righteousness because of my foes; make Your way straight before me. Psalm 5:8

255 – He Must Prune Me

255 – He Must Prune Me

January 24, 1987

By God’s wonderful and bountiful grace, I was 1 ½ hours in prayer from 5-6:30am.

This seems crystal clear:

John 15:2 Every branch that does not bear fruit He takes away – anger, selfishness, egocentricity – and every branch that bears fruit He prunes it that it may bear more fruit,

I see that my ministry with children (in public school) bore fruit—but all of these succeeding years have been a pruning process to get me out of me and into Him so that MORE fruit can come to His glory and honor and use.

Although today he prunes my twigs with pain,

Yet doth his blood nourish and warm my root:

Tomorrow I shall put forth buds again

and clothe myself with fruit.      -Christina Rosetti

254 – My God is the Lord

254 – My God is the Lord

January 22, 1987

For thus says the Lord, who created the heavens, who is God,

who formed the earth and made it,

who has established it, who did not create it in vain,

who formed it to be inhabited;

I am the Lord, and there is no other.

Look to Me, and be saved, all you ends of the earth!

For I am God, and there is no other.

I have sworn by Myself;

The word has gone out of My mouth in righteousness,

and shall not return,

that to Me every knee shall bow, every tongue shall take an oath. Isaiah 45:18, 22, 23

This is God’s declaration of Himself as the only true God.

We pray to our Creator.

He did not make a wasteland.

He did not speak in secret.

He wants ALL to turn to Him and be saved.

There is no other God.

His word has gone forth from His mouth in righteousness and will not turn back.

Every knee WILL bow.

Every tongue WILL swear allegiance.

Men WILL come.

Those who were angry at Him WILL be put to shame.

Thank You for opening the door wide so all who will bow to You CAN come in.

Thank You that I came in.

Use me, that others would come in.

253 – We Are Getting Revived

253 – We Are Getting Revived

January 14, 1987 up early

Today I begin my class at Elim, Cults and World Religions, taught by Ruth Rodriquez. I believe she is the only woman on staff here, and she requested to be addressed as Sister Ruth. I have been nervous, but quickly turning to God as I try to imagine how this will be accomplished since I feel I am already over-extended. But just now in prayer I got a confidence and peace from God that He will do it as I pray desperately about all areas and keep it all in His hands. Bless You, Father.

Woman where are they? Did no one condemn you? And she said No one, Lord. And Jesus said, Neither do I condemn you; go your way; from now on sin no more. John 8:10

As I am considering this verse, Jesus does not condemn me—ever, for any reason. I am not to denounce myself. Ever, for any reason. Just take it all to Him.

Later in the evening: I am realizing that my husband and my God have given me a beautiful gift: Tuesday and Thursday mornings away from my routine so I can be at Elim. Studying, being with adults, learning. Today, I felt a little bit like a fish out of water, but I believe I will very quickly get used to being at Elim for my class and then chapel from 11-12. Today chapel was all praising and worshipping. Nice.

January 21

So much has been happening, I cannot record it all. But the Lord is reviving Dan and I.

The verse in Haggai reminded me that our obedience and reverence for the Lord results in the Lord stirring up the spirits of those in our household. (Haggai 1:1-14)

Yesterday at chapel a man from Uganda spoke, encouraging us to not grow weary, to not be satisfied with where we are in Christ. He exhorted us to hunger for a deeper walk. Also, to lay our foundation in Jesus Christ solidly. The church in Uganda is flourishing, sin is diminishing. They are founded in CHRIST.

The stone which the builders rejected has become the chief corner stone. Psalm 118:22

Jesus said to them, “Did you never read in the Scriptures, ‘THE STONE WHICH THE BUILDERS REJECTED, THIS BECAME THE CHIEF CORNERSTONE; THIS CAME ABOUT FROM THE LORD, AND IT IS MARVELOUS IN OUR EYES’? Matthew 21:42

[Jesus as the Rock is also found in Mark 12:10; Luke 2:17; Acts 4:11; Romans 9:33; 1 Peter 2:7 and other places.]

251 – Musings of a Mother

251 – Musings of a Mother

January 6, 1986

I’m sitting in bed, jammied, creamed, teeth glistening and minty, in Momma’s pink robe, listening to the faint strains of Josie’s worship tape from her rooms below me. I look up and hundreds of pink and white fist-sized roses are cascading down from ‘rose heaven’ on the yellow wallpapered walls all around me. I love roses. I adore roses. Thank You, Father.

I love old things—like this house, 2-story, oak-framed windows and oak doors downstairs, old oak furniture left from original owners, lace curtains in the living room, beveled glass windows and a large bay window where the boys can sit and read. Praise You Father.

And the grass outside on these three beautiful acres is always green even under 13 inches of 4 day old snow. The wind is howling outside, but the house stands solidly around, under, and over me. Bless God. Bless My God.

The mudroom is a precious bonus and much used for muddy, or swimming-pool wet, or snowy-wet or rainy-wet boys.

Our sons–healthy, tired from the hours of this day filled with school work, play, sledding and sliding on icy hills on bottoms—are sound asleep in two bunk beds, warm, jammied in new blue GGDup Christmas jammies—with layers of covers, clean faces, prayed over, kissed, very much loved, daily forgiven. Thank You, Father. Praise my God.

Dear dear Dan, my wonderful God-given man, is at a week-of-prayer meeting hearing from You, worshiping You, being moved, changed, healed by You. Praise You for this once-in-a-lifetime, life-changing opportunity You have given us to grow and be ‘formed for service.’

Who knows what tomorrow brings, what next week or this summer brings? May I please be given, and receive JOYFULLY, the grace to praise You in and for all of the circumstances of my life. Especially, the closeness of my husband and children. May the law of kindness be on my lips; may I truly be the joyful mother of my children.

For Your glory, for my rest.

He makes the barren woman abide in the house as a joyful mother of children. Praise the Lord! Psalm 113:9

The law of kindness is on her tongue. Psalm 31:26

250 – Singing with the Lord

250 – Singing with the Lord

January 2, 1987

Last week:

*Brian (the man who is suing us) and Crystal, his wife,  came to dinner. It was very friendly.

* Dan got very sick.

*We registered the big green van and then went to Trezise’s so the boys could play on their trampoline in their barn. Mr. T is a gymnast and a gymnastics instructor. We cannot afford for the boys to have lessons at this time.

Come bless the Lord, all ye servants of the Lord, who stand by night in the house of the Lord.

Lift up your hands in the holy place, and bless the Lord, and bless the Lord. ( a song from Psalm 139)

Praising God in and for all of our troubles lifted my spirits. Praying in the Spirit before that enabled me to really praise Him.

Let me bless You today with music, singing, praise and worship. It would truly be a work of God because getting out of myself in these ways does not come naturally.

January 6

This is the Week of Prayer at Elim, the first week of the semester. There are four meetings a day 1 ½ – 2 hours long. Dan sent me off to the late afternoon meeting so I could experience a blessing.

This song struck me: Your Steadfast Love

Your Steadfast Love extends to the heavens;

Your faithfulness reaches to the clouds;

Your righteousness is like majestic mountains

And Your wisdom like the depths of the sea…and You come to me!

Filling my heart is Your lovingkindness;

I find peace in the shadow of Your wings.

I eat my fill from the abundance of Your household,

And I drink from the streams of rejoicing

You are my King, You are my King, You are My King, You are my King.

 –Ted Sandquist, 1973

My heart, O God, is steadfast, my heart is steadfast; I will sing and make music. Psalm 57:7