258 – Listening for God’s Direction

258 – Listening for God’s Direction

February 17 and 18, 1987

Dan said yesterday he wanted to call Pastor Dave to see if maybe he had a prophetic word for us that would give us some guidance. Should we continue here on this course or return home to Reno…

Today Pastor Dave called us!

Dan did not share specifics with Dave because we want to hear from the Lord, not get man’s advice. Nothing definitive transpired. He asked what he could do for us, Dan said pray. 

When my mom asked yesterday how the money situation was, I said fine.

We’re depending on God, not man. He will come through with job and provision and clear direction.

In the news from home, Pastor Dave, a former policeman, said that the youth activities area in the juvenile department of the jail is open to and welcoming the Christian message! They have so many youth on drugs they know they need outside help with the kids.

Friends of ours are selling their house and business and going into full-time ministry in a nearby town. I am stirred! Happy for them. Things are happening in Reno.

But living in Livonia has been such a refuge for me. A healing place. It’s not easy to think of letting go of it.

And the Lord opened her (Lydia’s) heart to respond to the things spoken by Paul. Acts 16:14

Open my heart to the things of the Spirit as I read Your word today!

Now while Paul was waiting for them at Athens, his spirit was being provoked within him as he was beholding the city full of idols. Acts 17:16

Paul was provoked by the many idols in the city and my spirit was greatly provoked as I watched the Transcendental Meditation video in the Cults class. I finally had to leave.

It’s still amazing to me how when I read in the Bible it relates to my life so perfectly.

257 – More Time with My Boys

257 – More Time

with My Boys

February 4, 1987

I woke up at 2:30am concerned about Stevie, feeling I’m so busy I don’t just sit and listen and play with him and his brothers. I had a few ideas on how to help each of them: an old idea that each boy could get a turn to go alone with Dan , then with me the next time, to the diner down the street, for a milkshake or something. Walk, hold hands, chat.

also: I could ask Carleen if I could bring one boy at a time to spend the morning with her boys while I am at class at Elim.

also: skip a homeschool subject once in a while to play a game with one boy.

May God help me. Why do I know He will? He always does.

Commit your way to the Lord, trust also in Him, and He shall bring it to pass. Psalm 37:5

The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord, and He delights in his way. Psalm 37:23

256 – Stay or Go Home

256 – Stay or Go Home

February 1, 1987 5am

Dan woke up with a vision of a jar with a vacuum in it—sucking his hands, rendering him helpless. It related to his friend in the mental institution. It struck fear into Dan’s heart. He felt it was definitely a warning to get out of this relationship. We obviously cannot help this friend.

I believe that Dan has been trying to save someone who does not want to be saved. And that this has put us in a place of impotency. It has clouded his present judgment. 

Such a tragic situation for this couple and for the rest of us. But our God restores.

Dan has been talking of leaving Elim in the middle of this semester. He had thought of not signing up for any classes at all so we could leave easily. As he shared this I felt peace though I was a little dismayed at moving on so soon from this wonderful place.

Show us the way, Lord.

Psalm 34:1 I will bless the Lord at all times; His praise shall continually be in my mouth.

7 The angel of the Lord encamps all around those who fear Him, and delivers them.

O LORD, lead me in Your righteousness because of my foes; make Your way straight before me. Psalm 5:8

255 – He Must Prune Me

255 – He Must Prune Me

January 24, 1987

By God’s wonderful and bountiful grace, I was 1 ½ hours in prayer from 5-6:30am.

This seems crystal clear:

John 15:2 Every branch that does not bear fruit He takes away – anger, selfishness, egocentricity – and every branch that bears fruit He prunes it that it may bear more fruit,

I see that my ministry with children (in public school) bore fruit—but all of these succeeding years have been a pruning process to get me out of me and into Him so that MORE fruit can come to His glory and honor and use.

Although today he prunes my twigs with pain,

Yet doth his blood nourish and warm my root:

Tomorrow I shall put forth buds again

and clothe myself with fruit.      -Christina Rosetti

254 – My God is the Lord

254 – My God is the Lord

January 22, 1987

For thus says the Lord, who created the heavens, who is God,

who formed the earth and made it,

who has established it, who did not create it in vain,

who formed it to be inhabited;

I am the Lord, and there is no other.

Look to Me, and be saved, all you ends of the earth!

For I am God, and there is no other.

I have sworn by Myself;

The word has gone out of My mouth in righteousness,

and shall not return,

that to Me every knee shall bow, every tongue shall take an oath. Isaiah 45:18, 22, 23

This is God’s declaration of Himself as the only true God.

We pray to our Creator.

He did not make a wasteland.

He did not speak in secret.

He wants ALL to turn to Him and be saved.

There is no other God.

His word has gone forth from His mouth in righteousness and will not turn back.

Every knee WILL bow.

Every tongue WILL swear allegiance.

Men WILL come.

Those who were angry at Him WILL be put to shame.

Thank You for opening the door wide so all who will bow to You CAN come in.

Thank You that I came in.

Use me, that others would come in.

248 – His Death for Me

248 – His Death for Me

December 28, 1986

Jesus said to the disciples when He asked them to pray about what was ahead:

Pray that you may not enter into temptation. Luke 22:40

And again He said: Why are you sleeping? Rise and pray that you may not enter into temptation. v 46

I confess sleeping instead of praying all to often, Lord. I repent. Bring the grace and strength I need, PLEASE. Be faithful to Yourself because You live in me!

A couple of days ago as I was reviewing Galatians 2:20:

I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me.

A scenario popped into my mind that God was leading me on a journey—it was me walking The Way of the Cross. I was taking accusations that I deserved, taking beatings that I deserved because of sin in my life; people in the crowd were jeering from hatefulness—real people with faces—representing those whom I had spoken idle words against or had wounded or had ‘killed’ with gossip or accusations. They put the crown on me and laughed. They wounded me and pushed me and made me carry the cross—and made me get up on it—and I DESERVED to be on it.

Yet it was only like a dream because My Savior went in my place and took all of this FOR ME so I do not have to take it. I get the benefits of His substitutionary death.

In return, I give You my life to use as You see fit.

246 – Repenting of a Bad Attitude

246 – Repenting of a Bad Attitude

December 27, 1986

Much repenting of my bad bad attitude, and still more to do.

I had three calls on Christmas day! Mom, Susie, and Karen. I cast my cares on Karen!! She called back the next day but I was out shopping with Tim and Stevie. She was very concerned about me and suspicious that the spirits that are bothering our neighbors were affecting us adversely—and she was frightened for me.

Dan recalled an “evil, beastie-looking thing” appearing the night before!—which he had neglected to tell me about! So we took Karen’s suggestion and prayed through the house. Then we prayed again at night.

Today was much better.

Also, I did devotions with the kids yesterday morning and asked Dan if he would join us. I turned to “do all things without grumbling or disputing” (Philippians 2:14) and the whole verse was perfect. We had all just read an Arch book about the seeds falling on various types of ground, so we prayed our hearts would be GOOD ground and would receive the Word of God.

We also laid down the law that their behavior HAD to change. As a result, the last two days have been gloriously happy and positive. It’s like a huge burden lifted!

Philippians 2:14-16 Do all things without complaining and disputing, that you may become blameless and harmless, children of God without fault in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world, holding fast the word of life, so that I may rejoice in the day of Christ that I have not run in vain or labored in vain.

We are holding fast to the word of life. We are holding fast to Jesus.        

244 – I Choked the Word in the Christmas Rush

244 – I Choked the Word in the Christmas Rush

December 22, 1986

I’m glad I wrote on Dec 1 and Dec 2 all of our prayer requests. I see that God is answering prayers. Thank You, Father.

I was awful for 3 days. Finally today, as I address last package that we had to take to UPS—it broke! Whatever was on me, oppressing me, from the stress of Christmas duties is gone.

Included in my overwhelming feelings were female issues, stress of getting presents purchased and wrapped, finishing our craft projects, packages prepared for mailing. I also ate a few sugar cookies and some licorice—bad. Totally worked against me.

Dan prayed, Karen called, God moved.

I read in a book by Ruth H. Calkins: “God, I resign!” “–Good, You’re Promoted!”

I resign, Lord. But I want kindness and patience NOW! (I said as I threw a tantrum)(not really)

Going to my Bible to get the Word back into me:

Love is patient, love is kind. 1 Corinthians 13:4.

… love covers all transgressions. Proverbs 10:12

And we urge you brethren, admonish the unruly, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with all men. 1 Thessalonians 5:1

Above all keep fervent in your love for one another, because love covers a multitude of sins. 1 Peter 4:8

Remembering something I heard from the Spirit the moment the last of the packages was wrapped: “the cares of this world CHOKED the good seed.” –i.e., my concern for the trappings of Christmas choked the life of Jesus, the Word, in my life. And I’ve been miserable!

242 – Warning and Prayers

242 – Warning and Prayers

December 15, 1986

Warning in my devotions:

Nevertheless, with most of them God was not well pleased: for they were laid low in the wilderness. Now these things happened as examples for us, that we should not crave evil things, as they also craved. 1 Corinthians 10:5-6

Cleanse me Lord; make me clean and pure in any way You see that I need it. Search me. My eyes are staid on Thee, my heart is full of Thee. Let nothing come between us.

I see friends whose marriages are in great danger right now because of cravings not taken to the cross. Please show them this truth this week. Please reveal the specific things you are not pleased with that they must let go of to get back on track in their marriages. PLEASE.

KEEP US, Lord, keep Dan and I true to You, keep us wholly Yours. Send grace to help in time of need.

Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need. Hebrews 4:16

237 – The Mind of Christ

237 – The Mind of Christ

December 3, 1986

Colossians 3:12-17

And so those who have been CHOSEN OF GOD, holy and beloved,

PUT ON A HEART OF COMPASSION

KINDNESS

HUMILITY

GENTLENESS

PATIENCE

BEARING WITH ONE ANOTHER, whoever has a complaint against any one;

JUST AS THE LORD FORGAVE YOU, so also should you.

And beyond all these things

PUT ON LOVE, which is the perfect bond of unity

And let the PEACE OF CHRIST

                        RULE

in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body

AND BE THANKFUL.

LET THE WORD OF CHRIST RICHLY DWELL WITHIN YOU,

with all wisdom teaching and admonishing one another with psalms and hymns and spiritual songs,

SINGING WITH THANKFULNESS IN YOUR HEARTS TO GOD.

And whatever you do in word or deed, DO ALL in the name of the LORD JESUS,

GIVING THANKS through Him to God the Father.

Precious words. It is the mind of Christ. And that is what I want, Lord.