370 – Crusade Experiences

370 – Crusade Experiences

August 23, 1989 San Francisco

Sense a cleansing and a new beginning. In my mind’s eye I see everything in me and in my life as pure white as snow. Step by Step with my High Priest, My Intercessor, will I walk today, leaving behind the OLD, wrapped up in the new life and encouraged, hopeful, pressing on, filled with the Holy Ghost.

I fully relinquish a critical spirit as part of my personality. It is no longer! If it should come near I will by faith rebuke it—as with all lusts of the eye and flesh. I will be content with what I have knowing My God IS IN control. I will receive WISDOM as I cry out for it today regarding ways of honoring my husband and loving and dealing with our children. I expect God’s provision in all areas. Amen and Hallelujah!

August 25

Mario Murillo Crusade on Wed night, Dan received an infilling of the Spirit as powerful as the first laying on of hands in Reno. He received

            Do not grow weary … you will reap! Galatians 6:9

Danny Herd, who was in charge of equipment and organization, said thanks to Dan—that he wished he had ten men like Dan.

The pastor of the church was extremely grateful for Dan and the boys cleaning up each evening before the crusade.

When Dan passed out posters of the Cow Palace Crusade in Hunters Point District, he said he was well received.

Timmy and Markie went forward for the baptism of the Holy Spirit!! Markie said he almost got pushed down by the Spirit, he was swaying back and forth, but didn’t want to fall.

Tim and Markie were prayed for by Caleb Quaye and Tim also was prayed for by Pastor Stewart and Mario Murillo’s wife. Praise God. His jaw is still in place. We will see what the Lord will do.

The Holy Spirit came on me in intercession and in love.

354 – Rejoice Instead

354 – Rejoice Instead

July 26, 1989 San Francisco

I am still obsessed with thoughts of pregnancy. I try to keep relinquishing it to the Lord. The trouble is that I know He is able to perform His will against all physical impediments. And I love miracles. And besides, every other day there is something to draw my attention to it. Today Mr. Rogers said—Oh, sometimes ladies feel wonderful when they’re pregnant, better than normal! So my mind turns that way. And I have friends who have the baby yearnings, also.

The boys had an autobiography of John Newton. Some of this is quoted, some is paraphrased.

Through ignorance and unbelief we often mistake the Lord’s dealings with us, and are ready to complain. If we knew all, we would rejoice instead! When our eye is fixed upon the Lord, we are more than conquerors over all that would withstand our progress.

Looking back, I see that mercy and goodness directed every step.

What our ignorance once called adversities and evils, were in reality blessings which we could not have done well without. Nothing befell us without a cause; no trouble came upon us sooner or pressed down more heavily or continued longer than our case required. Our many afflictions were, each in their place, among the means employed by divine grace and wisdom to bring us to the possession of that exceeding and eternal weight of glory which the Lord has prepared for His people.

Interesting. Be a rejoicing person. Be prayerful.

351- Prayer and Support

351 – Prayer and Support

April 3, 1989 Monday

Prayed believing prayers & verses. Still uptight. Everything is difficult!

In the afternoon I picked up Dennis Bennett’s book, 9:00 in the Morning, which Linda lent us. It is the story of his baptism in the Holy Spirit. Cried. Began praying in tongues.

Everything lifted. I became a changed person.

Till later… when I focused on the house mess. We have extra furniture from Deborah, clothes from Beth—aaaaaa! This place is too small for all of this!! Began praying in tongues again.

Yesterday I really looked at the boys’ Sunday schedule and marveled.

Sunday morning they have Sunday School – I teach Daniel, Dan teaches Mark and Stevie. There are no other students. Timmy goes with Helen’s class. Then the kids sit through the worship and teaching of the main service.

We go home for lunch and are back at the church at 4:30 for a meeting, then service at 6. There is no planned activity for them, yet they are amazingly content. Supernaturally content. God, you are supremely gracious as we go through these things.

April 5 – my 44th birthday

God came through via Karen! She sent $50! We all went out to pizza!! Thank You so much, Jesus!

April 6

Victorious day!! Got prayer from Dan and good support from God!

349 – Lots of Encouragement

349 – Lots of Encouragement

April 2, 1989 Sunday

I went forward for prayer for homeschool—that I could be Christ-like in it. We were instructed by Joyce to let God speak to us on the issue we had brought forth. I am not always trusting  to do this, but took a risk and said, “okay, God—please speak!” In rapid succession, these verses popped into my mind:

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me; My grace is sufficient for thee–for My strength is made perfect in weakness; whether you turn to the right or to the left, you will hear a voice behind you saying this is the way, walk in it.*

WOW He spoke completely by His Word!

I confided to Joyce that I had been up and down on this issue many times. She said very emphatically, “That sounds like doubt.” And it was.

Before the night meeting started, Joyce said she had prayed about our homeschooling (it was still something that few people did in 1989, and not everyone believed it was a good idea), and she felt the Lord had said: “The boys are at home because the constant change of friends and schools would end up being too traumatic over time. So He’s covering the bases.”

Dan prayed for a man who was a newcomer, and then the man prayed for Dan. He prayed that Dan would bring in the harvest, many souls, that we would go overseas, that our whole family would be involved in bringing people to the Lord. PRAISE GOD! The man himself was surprised at his own prayer! Dan wept.

Thank You for all of the encouragement, Lord.

*Philippians 4:13; 2 Corinthians 12:9; Isaiah 30:21.

347 – The Word Refreshes the Weary

347 – The Word Refreshes

the Weary

March 24, 1989

Feeling tired.

Galatians 6:9 Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.

Reaping sounds like a good promise. I’ll take it.

March 25

God is teaching me faithfulness in the long haul as I keep on track with Him. I am to bear with my sons and come to Him for inspiration, revelation, joy, strength, empowerment of the Holy Spirit.

My goals for the boys:

Philippians 1:9 that your love may bound in knowledge and depth of insight so you are able to discern good and evil and be pure and blameless!

and be filled with the fruit of righteousness!

v 12 my chains (my struggle to stay upbeat, loving, fair, patient & kind) will encourage others.

My exhortation to myself from Philippians: be set on rejoicing!

v 19 It’s all going to work out through the prayers of the saints and the help of the Holy Spirit

The Holy Spirit will bring my deliverance (the ability to rise above the circumstances which would pull me down otherwise)

v 20 Paul expects he will not be ashamed through all of his trials and he expects he will have sufficient courage to continue so Christ will be exalted through him.

v 21 Christ is my reason for living. All my life takes on meaning and relevance and purpose because of Christ.

v 25 Paul chooses to keep on so they will progress in the faith

so they will be joyful in growing and advancing.  (I see this in my sons, a joy and a camaraderie)

NIV note: Paul puts the needs of those he ministers to ahead of his personal preference. Such an example.

 

346 – Identifying with Much-Afraid*

346 – Identifying with

Much-Afraid*

March 19, 1989 Sunday morning

I was led to read Psalm 128:3-4 Your wife will be like a fruitful vine within your house; your children will be like olive shoots around your table. Yes, this will be the blessing for the man who fears the LORD.

Later reading Babar, a children’s book, to the kids: triplets were born! that causes my heart to skip.

March 20

Calling out to the Lord, as Much Afraid*, putting my hope in HIM.

March 21

Middle of the night, very nauseous.

Lay real still.

Cautious this a.m.

Rich food last night.

As I come to my Lord this morning I am NOT going to try to do this myself and be tough!

HELP SHEPHERD!

Let us get a pregnancy test. Let the truth, yea or nay, be known before we travel to Oxnard. I’m not going to try doing this on my own without YOU. I’m falling upon my precious Savior, BELIEVING You will SAVE ME and be a blessed Redeemer today for us all. I lay down my self will and accept your will, in  abandonment, fully trusting You. 

March 22 Up early to pray and humble myself before the Lord.

Humble yourselves–feeling very insignificant–in the presence of the Lord, and He will exalt you.–He will lift you up and make your lives significant. James 4:10 Amplified

The squeeze of my family’s questionings and probing always concerns me before I go to visit them–and I see acutely the need I have for strength to stand in faith because I am so weak.

Habakkuk 3:17-18 Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the LORD, I will be joyful in God my Savior.

NIV notes: Habakkuk has learned the lesson of faith—to trust God’s providence regardless of circumstances. He declares that even if God should send suffering and loss, he would still rejoice in His Savior God—one of the strongest affirmations of faith in all scripture.

v. 19 The Sovereign LORD is my strength; He makes my feet like the feet of a deer, He enables me to tread on the heights.

NIV notes: He gives me sure-footed confidence.

You always meet me, Jesus, You always come to me in a way I can understand.

*Much-Afraid is the protagonist in Hannah Hurnard’s bestselling book Hinds’ Feet on High Places, an allegory published in 1955. Much-Afraid finds comfort and understanding and a new kind of accepting love from the Shepherd. She desires only to please Him and always turns to Him for advice. Her greatest joy is in serving Him. I identified with her and her relationship with Jesus on her spiritual journey.

345 – My Faith Gets Shaken

345 – My Faith Gets Shaken

March 16, 1989

One night, ten years ago, when we were attending Bible school in Germany and I was anxious about the well being of my baby in the womb, and I was crying out to God, He gave me this verse. It is a precious promise that the children I bear are blessed by God.

Praise the Lord, O Jerusalem!
Praise your God, O Zion!
For He has strengthened the bars of your gates;
He has blessed your sons within you.
He makes peace in your borders;
He satisfies you with the finest of the wheat. Psalm 147:12-14

March 17, 1989

4am awakened with a distressing physical symptom.

Confused. If I cannot believe that all of the way we’ve come in this baby issue was Your leading –how can I believe You about Your leading to homeschool, Your leading that we are going to Japan….

Will I now have to question everything else that we are doing by faith?

Back to bed.

Felt waves of comfort and grace!

Dan was compassionate. He quoted:

The LORD is near to the brokenhearted, and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the LORD delivers him out of them all. Psalm 34:18-19

Dan came in later and said, “In some way that only God can do, this whole experience you are having is going to confirm our calling.”

I talked to God.

Dan said, rest and pray in the Spirit all day, not in words that could express doubt and fear.

So I began my day expecting Jesus to be very near to me and very real. Bless You, Savior.

The thought also came to me: to have another baby is not a selfish desire of mine—that is a lie. To have been home already for ten years and if I had another baby, it would add five more years to the tail end of that. I know myself well enough that I know I would not choose that. Yet, if a baby is God’s will for us, I would gladly do this for Him, for His will, for His plan.

This lifted me also, encouraged me. It is the will of the Lord I am seeking. Yes, my heart is pure about this.

344 – Conflict in the Home Soon Resolved

344 – Conflict in the Home

Soon Resolved

March 4, 1989 Sunday at church

Joyce came up to me: “Are you pregnant? I woke up thinking about you.” She prayed for me.

March 14, 1989  Tim, Steve, and Danny have had Chickenpox for a week. Mark was the first to come down with it and is now well.

Two days late. I opened up my Bible randomly, seeking the Lord.

Isaiah 66:7 Before she goes into labor, she gives birth, before the pains come upon her, she delivers a son.            

What are the odds that I would see a verse about birthing?

Dan laughed when I shared all of this: “This is the third month in a row you have thought you were pregnant. I’d rather laugh than take it seriously—of course you may have the last laugh.”

Sting!

This comforted me:

Isaiah 44: 25-26 who overthrows the learning of the wise and turns it into nonsense…who carries out the words of his servants and fulfills the predictions of His messengers.

I had great sorrow from my conversation with Dan. In order to focus on my glorious God, I put my Bible on the counter and kept going back to it, highlighting truth about God, keeping my focus on HIM.

I had a wonderful prayer time with Akiko and Reiko.

Reconciliation with Dan this evening and the next morning he said is excited about the possibility of a pregnancy.

Dan and I are of one mind, waiting on the Lord.

March 15

I had a good prayer time this afternoon. I laid the pregnancy possibility out again before the Lord along with all off the thoughts in my deceitful heart as well as my heart’s desires.

It occurred to me –what if people thought I had fooled around and gotten pregnant, since I have such a checkered past. A verse I memorized years ago jumped out at me:

Proverbs 16:7 When a man’s ways are pleasing to the Lord, He makes even his enemies be at peace with him.

I believe Your word is alive, and that you just spoke to me!

Fear is gone!

342 – God’s Word for Me

342 – God’s Word for Me

February 15 Wednesday

I went to church, intent on going up for prayer for spotting and expecting a word of prophecy through Joyce. Deborah and I sought her out after church. Before I started sharing, she asked if I was pregnant. I didn’t answer her because I did not know the answer. I asked for her to pray and ask the Lord for a word for me.

Deborah tried to keep up with Joyce’s words and wrote this down:

Depth in you, Georgann, magnitude, that has gone on that human words cannot describe. Only the Spirit can interpret the things I have for you.

This night you kneel before me in purity.

I receive you as one who is pure, holy, set apart.

He has seen my limitations, shortcomings and what I have wrestled with, and the times I fell down before Him and chose Him.

It will be easy to hear the things that cause your heart to skip, but these things come from the depth of what has gone on between us in groanings.

Bring forth in quietness and bring forth in subtlety.

Blessed be the Lord who has looked upon me.

What is going on in your body is as a passing vapor.

Don’t be distracted from Me by it. From this day forward whatever you see in your body you are to know you are held tightly in my arms. I have plans for you—a future and a hope. Bring your body to me as a living sacrifice. Let me wash you. Follow my instructions.

He wants me to ask—What should I do?

I remember that Joyce was extremely tired to the point of exhaustion this night, and yet she said she sensed the Spirit of the Lord. She said that this was the Lord—she was too tired to have said it in her own strength. She asked: did it even make sense?

This word was long and very personal to me. The Lord was validating our relationship, confirming that He saw every struggle and every surrender of mine. He recognized a depth in me, He heard my groanings–my questions and my “mournful sounds of grief.” He saw me as a pure vessel. He did not want me to be distracted from Him by the baby vision. I believe He wanted to keep me in the place of mystery so I could learn lessons in trusting Him and not leaning on my own understanding. Follow My instructions meant he was holding me tightly and that He had plans for me, and that He would lead me through this step by step.

There was not the specific answer to my inner question: am I pregnant or will I become pregnant? But God’s ways are high above our ways.

“As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts. 

As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,

so is My word that goes out from My mouth: It will not return to Me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it. Isaiah 55:9-11 NIV

[I added capital letters for references to God to the NIV translation]

341 – Our Ministry Goals

341 – Our Ministry Goals

February 13, 1989

I came across our newsletter, which we sent out to our friends and family. From the letter, which is a review of our last few months in order to catch everyone up:

As we crossed the country, our little motorhome performed flawlessly, only needing one tire, and that was provided without cost to us. We had to stop twice for Dan to work and earn enough money to go on and God provided wonderful friends to work for and with. 

Grace was ours to live in a 120 sq. ft. house on wheels without ever feeling like “I gotta get out of here.” And our new home is a wonderful refuge, just what Georgann had been praying for–in a wooded place where the boys can play out of city dangers. We live in a complex that used to be a convent and now is a Christian high school that rents out apartments on a floor that is not used for classrooms. It’s been very confirming to us just how our faithful Father has worked all this out. We feel confirmed that we belong here and built up in our faith to proceed.

When we first got here in SF we dove right into the Japanese community to find out all we could, attended some interesting Japanese Christmas parties at the Japanese Cultural Center, and hung around Japantown finding more Japanese than we expected who are ‘fresh off the boat’ so to speak, rather than American born. There is very little being done to evangelize among the Japanese, especially considering their numbers. I have walked through Japantown praying the streets and have rediscovered the ferocious entrenchment of opposition in the spiritual realm which surrounds Japanese culture, an entrenchment which can also be very aggressive and dark.

We are praying for strategy as we begin our outreach to the Japanese.